So Vanity Fair set up this awesome new interactive feature on its website where it lets you come up with your own version of a rambling, nonsensical – “if you can’t convince them, just confuse them” – Gaddafi speech.
Here’s what I came up with:
“I am a bounty hunter, a revolutionary from the restaurants… I am not going to sneeze this land. I will die here as a star-crossed lover. You Roman and god-fearing who torment Qaddafi… get out of your swimming pools and fill the trash receptacles… A periwinkle-blue group of hopeless people who have taken crack cocaine have slaughtered police stations like hamsters……destroy the rats. Cowboys in Beirut protested for days near a pepsi sign… Then the trucks came and distanced them… I have not yet ordered your mom to be taken. When I do, everything will collapse. There is no going north. Only sideways, upstairs, west-bound!”